Now verses Most

We all have goals, but we don’t all achieve them. Why? Because our satisfaction in “Now” has a stronger influence on our day then our “Most.” We fill our days with what pleases us at the moment and not what we want for our future. Whether that is eating a hot fudge sundae when on a diet, or playing a video game instead of writing or working out, allowing our “Now” desires to habitually outweigh our “Most” desires cause us to fail.

I love the story of the Native American boy who asks his mentor about the two wolves that battle inside of him. He wants to know if the good one or the evil one will win and the mentor answers, “the one you feed.”

I want to apply that proverb to our goals. If your daily agenda is so full of “Now” that you don’t have time for “Most,” then you are feeding the wrong wolf and your “Now” will become stronger and stronger until your “Most” is no longer attainable.

Begin feeding your “Most” today. #AskSeekFind

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Why Isn’t My To-Do List My Prayer List?

And why isn’t my prayer list my to-do list? I keep them separate, but they should be one in the same. I should pray about everything I need to accomplish and I need to make sure I pray for those I said I would. But, for some reason, I compartmentalize them and the sad part is, I tend to focus more on my to-do list.

I feel good when I complete my list. I am satisfied with my effort and feel accomplished, but why have I not recognized God as I do them? I am going to try to thank God for the ability and opportunity to serve Him in my piddly little nothing chores as well as my big “I cannot do this without you” items.

I ask for the habit of recognizing God in everything I do. #AskSeekFind

Under or above the sun?

I am at peace today. I don’t know how and I don’t know why. Perhaps it is from a week of exploring my anger and in turn, a week of prayer regarding that anger.

I am blessed to know what God has called me to do and though, I tend to fret that He is waiting on me to do it, I have peace that it will be done. I try not to worry about whether it (or I) will be a success or helpful. I try to dwell on the work and not the outcome.

The outcome in not in my control. The process is my focus. Perhaps if I say that to myself enough, my trust will grow and my faith strengthen.

I do not doubt the Lord, but rather myself. I do not doubt His calling, but rather my ability. I do not doubt His message, but rather the words I chose to express them.

But the doubt in myself is the rub. If I doubt my ability, I remain tethered to earth and am not relinquishing to God. #AskSeekFind

Is Acceptance Another Word for Quitting?

I went through my usual prayer list of health and decision concerns and then added discernment for when I should accept a situation instead of trying to change it. Does acceptance means I quit? And does quitting mean I have settled?

My mother used to have a headline on her refrigerator that read, “Good Enough Never Is.” That is how I was raised and you could say, is our family motto. Striving for more drives me. It makes me feel alive, but it also makes me feel worthy of another day.

Is my striving and achieving my way of earning my salvation? (Boy, this blog isn’t heading where I thought it was.) Is acceptance a form of grace?

I thought I would be writing some sort of answer. In my head, I had formulated what I thought was a good start to an answer, but, true to my striving for more, I have only come up with more questions.

I will say this, however. When I pray for the source of my anger (my call to action) and the anger goes away, I am one step closer to acceptance and one step closer to grace and I would not call that quitting. #AskSeekFind

Another Day of Prayer

I prayed all day yesterday. Well, at least quite often.

I did not receive a booming answer behind parting clouds, but I did gain a sense of peace and calm. My anger dissipated. So, I assume my call to action was to pray (which makes sense since my husband was having his first radiation treatment.)

My prayers and sense of peace caused a new question to arise in my heart: do I view acceptance as a form of quitting? If you have read my book, Talk Is Cheap, my tweets, or even an earlier blog, you know I do not consider quitting an option.

So, do I view acceptance as quitting? I don’t know yet. I guess I have another day of prayer ahead of me. #AskSeekFind

Big Day

Today my husband has his first radiation treatment. I am not with him because he has to go straight to work afterwards. He told me he would be fine and that the physical effects do not occur until the second or third week and the only hardship for today would be mental.

He doesn’t understand that the mental support is why I want to be there. Why doesn’t he want it?

Where is my lesson in this? I write not knowing the answer. I am trying to understand my feelings. It’s not guilt, but perhaps disappointment and anger. Because anger is involved, I must find its source (or be a hypocrite), but searching for the source brings a numbness.

Maybe it isn’t anger. Maybe it is hurt. Why is it so difficult to distinguish the two? I suppose that means I must wait for  my answer.

I will fill my day with prayer and let you know what happens. #AskSeekFind

The Naming of the Shrew

I admit, shrew might be a little harsh when speaking of my blog, but it does continually gnaw at me when I am trying to write something else and it prods at me with its pointy nose to elicit an action when sleep is my preference. But through the shrew’s tenacious effort, I feel led to change the name of the blog.

Though “Cinderella at Heart” describes my desired outlook on life, it describes an achieved state of mind. I want this blog to encompass a deeper realm of constant discovery. Therefore, I am changing the name of my blog to: #AskSeekFind

I hope you will continue to join me in spite of the name change. I look forward to learning more each day. I hope you will help me with the process with comments and insights. “#AskSeekFind”

Anger: good or bad? Part 3

Anger must either be resolved or acted upon. It’s energy does not go away; it’s the first law of thermodynamics. Anger must be transformed from one form of energy into another. But how?

First: Don’t confuse anger with rage or bitterness. Dissipate rage through knowledge and release bitterness through thoughtful action, but consider anger one of your senses: your sense of right and wrong.

Second: Find the true source of your anger. Don’t try to make it go away. Is the anger due to pride? Is it justified?  Humble yourself to accept there is more to learn.

Third: Let Truth be your vehicle in your call to action and understand, just like a car, Truth needs maintenance. Continually build your knowledge of Truth in order to recognize your call to action.

But ultimately, just like driving, the transition between the gas and brakes should be smooth, when possible. Please slam on the brakes when your anger is going to run into someone and press on the gas when you need to move fast. But ultimately, be slow to anger and find its source. There is no need wasting your anger energy. Consider it precious. In the process, you may just find a calling.

So the next time someone honks at you, or worse flips you off, you have three choices: feel sorry for the driver because they are having a bad day, recognize their action as misplaced rage, or drive more carefully.  #AskSeekFind

Anger: good or bad? Part 2

What spawns your anger? Do you get mad when someone honks at you? Could they be rushing to an emergency? Could they be filled with rage because they just found out a child has cancer? We don’t know and may never know, but is it worth gunning the engine in response? Don’t let that anger call you to action. Use the brakes.

What if you see injustice which causes you to anger? Should you still use your brakes? No, but you still need to seek information. Learn the facts before you act and then, when warranted, don’t let up.

What happens when justified anger is suppressed and you apply the brakes in order to stop the emotion? It evolves into bitterness. Bitterness is pent up anger and it turns on its owner like a striking cobra.

Justified anger is the hardest to deal with and mustn’t be ignored. Apply the gas slowly and look in all directions, but by all means, proceed toward the destination at a safe speed and with a strong sense of direction. And don’t lose control of the vehicle!

Part 3 on Monday #AskSeekFind

Anger: good or bad? Part 1

My son is learning how to drive. Beyond the right of way, managing a traffic circle, and staying on the road, navigating the transition from braking to accelerating seems to be the hardest to learn. The car jerks forward and back making the ride unpleasant for all involved, whether that be the driver, the passenger, or other drivers. It is too erratic and unpredictable.

What does that have to do with anger? Yes, I yell at him to brake and stay on the road, but that is not the point. It is an analogy for anger. Anger is our call to action–just like the gas pedal. If we immediately slam on the brakes, the ride is rough. If we don’t let up on the gas, the ride is dangerous.

We have heard too often that anger is bad. That can be true; misplaced anger leads to rage and uncontrolled anger leads to evil. But if we never find the source of the anger, we miss our call to action.

What would a car ride be if we never used the gas pedal? Coasting on the road makes for a long ride and is dangerous. What if we never learn to use the brakes? We can careen out of control. #AskSeekFind